A Different Set of Shoes

"And I want you to feel it-the wind coming off the river, the waves, the silence, the wooded frontier. You're at the bow of a boat on the Rainy River. You're twenty-one years old, you're scared, and there's a hard squeezing pressure in your chest. What would you do? Would you jump? Would you feel pity for yourself? Would you think about your family and your childhood and your dreams and all you're leaving behind? Would it hurt? Would it feel like dying? Would you cry as I did?" Page 54

This passage intrigued me. At the beginning of the chapter, the writer says he has never told this specific story before. I think this excerpt explains why. O'Brien was obviously very embarrassed of his cowardice. He was scared and tried to run away from the responsibility to serve his country. In this passage, he is calling out to the reader with the hope that someone will understand. He asks the reader to step into his shoes. All he wants is to have someone understand that young man's point of view before judging his actions.